I don’t know about you, but I never thought games journalism would be so lavish! In the course of reviewing one game this year, I’ve jetted off to some of the most extravagant locations on Earth. From international fashion shows in Paris to sun-kissed seaside retreats in Italy, and even a stunning hotel in Bangkok: I’ve seen it all! Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, so it is with a heavy heart (too soon, M. Soders?) that I must put down Hitman: Season One, and settle back into reality once more. With so many stunning maps, topping Hitman’s list of luxurious locales is a hard act to follow. With fans desperately holding out for any news on a Season Two announcement, I thought I’d take the time to review this mysterious list of holiday hotspots just asking to be added to IO Interactive’s world of assassination. Without any further ado, here is a list of the ICA’s top 5 locales that should be in Hitman: Season 2.
Destination 5 – London, England: “Rule Britannia”
Good Afternoon, 47. The first entry on our list is a financial hotspot for international corporations, the home of some of the most powerful politicians in Europe, and was previously the setting of some rather well-known children’s books about a boy who lived. Clearly, this young lad has never run into you.
The city of London is as glamorous by day as it is hazardous by night. With multiple landmarks such as The Tower of London, MI5, The Houses of Parliament and Windsor Castle, the scope and scale of your endeavours in the city almost beggars belief. You could be asked to handle a pesky politician, silence an up-and-coming socialite, or maybe even rub shoulders with royalty…
The possibilities are endless, and with the city facing unprecedented political turmoil due to the recent European Union referendum, the ICA may be called upon to bring a little panic to the streets of London, as it were. As The Clash once famously proclaimed: London is calling.
Destination 4 – Principality of Monaco: “Deo Juvante”
Our next destination is the principality of Monaco. A tax haven, populated by some of the most wealthy beings on Earth, the city-state is a playground for the global elite.
Perhaps the most notable event on the country’s calendar, the Formula One Grand Prix hosts it’s infamous Monte-Carlo race here. This event attracts the attention of the rich, powerful and possibly the dangerous, too. With things getting so fast and furious trackside, the roaring of engines and the screaming of fans might just make for the perfect cover, should you ever find yourself enjoying a day at the races, 47.
The country’s motto, ‘Deo Juvante’, is latin, meaning ‘with God’s help’. I can only imagine how, to an assassin such as you 47, this seems like less of a credo and more of a plea. Certainly, with the ICA against them, any targets in Monaco will need all the help they can get, divine or otherwise.
Destination 3 – Mexico City, Mexico: “Twenty Flowers”
Destination three may soon be a wall away if Washington has its say. Nonetheless, the ICA would love to see you deployed to Mexico, just in time for the country’s annual “Day of the Dead” celebrations.
The sheer tumult and party atmosphere would challenge IO Interactive in a way that up until now has only been attempted with destinations such as New Orleans, during the Mardi Gras festival in Hitman: Blood Money. With street parades, flotillas and thousands of people attending every year, the city’s ‘Day of the Dead’ festival is just the place for you to showcase your skills, wouldn’t you agree 47? I must admit, I do find the irony of such a destination particularly… amusing, after a fashion.
It is customary, during the Day of the Dead festivities, for families to honour those that have departed with marigolds during the festival. You know the ICA is not an organisation that does things in half measures, but since the list of those you have departed is rather extensive, I thought it best to send a bouquet or two ahead of your visit.
Destination 2 – New York, USA – “Live from New York”
I know you abhor the States, 47, but even I was shocked to learn that you have never been to the ‘Big Apple’. For a man who spends his nights pressing his suits, I thought you’d relish the chance to visit a city that sleeps less than you do.
The potential hilarity and mayhem on offer in a New York-based map is almost unthinkable. One can only imagine how a master of disguise would fare upon the boards of Broadway, or on the set of a world-renowned sketch comedy show, for instance. The possibilities would make even the most stalwart killer quake with excitement. Las Vegas and Washington were also considered, but you have already visited these cities in Hitman: Blood Money, so the ICA thought a change of scenery would do you some good.
Never mind the content such a map could offer, think of the context. New York at Christmas would be stunning to observe, and the possibility of a street parade through Times Square, or a map set in Central Park, would be amazing. New York could very well be the perfect playground for a master assassin, with other spaces being added much in the same way Hitman attempted to spruce up certain spaces with its summer add-ons.
Destination 1 – Classified, Romania: “The White Void”
I know returning to where it all began must be hard for you, 47, but The Asylum may have some answers regarding the mysterious game the ICA finds itself in with this ‘Providence’ organisation.
Having appeared in every ‘Hitman’ title to-date – whether as a playable level or in a flashback – the Asylum is still shrouded in mystery, and Agent 47 has not returned there for nearly thirteen years, following the release of Hitman: Contracts in 2004.
The facility where Agent 47 was ‘born’, the Asylum was once home to multiple clones of our hairless hero, as well as the man responsible for 47’s creation – Dr Ort-Meyer.
The opportunity to revisit this iconic location in ‘Hitman’ lore cannot be missed by IO, who have certainly alluded to a trip down memory lane with the mysterious conclusion to Hitman Season One.
Introducing new fans to this vital location, while also reuniting series die-hards with it, would be brilliant. The chance to see where it all began for Hitman, rendered in the superb Glacier engine, would be a dream come true and would make for a captivating opening or ending to Season Two, depending on how IO Interactive choose to approach the narrative.
With Christmas upon us, I don’t think the ICA will have need of your services for the immediate future, 47. Perhaps you should use the time you have to invest in some gifts for those closest to you? Your targets this time are myself and Victoria – and don’t spare any expense: I know how well the ICA pays you. You have ten days… I shall leave you to prepare. Good luck, 47.